Elegant criticism, questionable rooms

Your room asked to be roasted.

Send us one photo. A witty design roaster delivers a brutal-but-useful 60-second video and three fixes your renter budget can actually handle.

Public posting only with your consent. Feelings not included.

Roaster's note

“The chair is giving waiting room. We can fix that.”

The house rules

Savage about the space. Respectful about the person.

Your roast is only posted publicly when you explicitly say yes.

You leave with three specific, affordable changes—not vague designer advice.

A rotating panel of comedy-minded decorators makes each 60-second roast personal.

From mess to material

Upload a clear room photo and share the budget, renter restrictions, and design crimes you already know about.

Permission is part of the brief.

Choose whether your finished roast can join the public feed.

Part comedian, part decorator: they identify the chaos, land the punchlines, and record your custom response.

Get your video plus three practical moves. Add a visual glow-up when you want to see the room's better timeline.

Choose your damage

Start small or invite the full intervention. No design retainer, no mysterious consultation fee.

Light roast

A concise video roast with one high-impact fix for the room that needs a nudge.

The main event

A personalized 60-second roast plus three concrete, budget-conscious fixes.

$15

Visual redesign

An AI-mocked-up redesign video that shows what your room could become after the roast.

$30

Available as an upgrade

Checking current availability…

Your landlord won't fix the vibe

Upload the mess. We'll bring the jokes, the judgment, and a plan you can pull off without losing your deposit.